Know your Stars i mean Sk characters
by Lillythemarshmellowqueen
Summary: The evil Voice is back with his ever changing Chair here to torture our beloved Sk gang! I am known to be very random!rated T for launguage, voilence, safety and my awsome randomness!Hiatus is OVER I'll be updating shortly...
1. Ch1 Victim one: Asakura Hao

I just have to do Shaman king "know your stars" I know there's one out there but I cant help it!

Any way …… (you know name is headcase 7 for a reason!)

Disclaimer: Me no own Shaman King or charecters from any other publications , if I do then Chocolove's jokes really are funny!

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KNOW YOUR _STARS_ (ahem I mean shaman king characters)

Hao Asakura walked on to a stage. He saw a chair and decided to sit down.

Suddenly a disembodied voice echoed "Know your stars, know your stars, know your stars"

"Huh what? Who's there said" said Hao starting to get up suddenly belts leap to life and keep him on the chair.

Voice: Hao Asakura … he is legally blond.

Hao: O.o …..

Voice: ahem Hao Asakura … he married a cow

Hao: What! I am not even married (regaining his self control) where are you ! I'm not even blonde!

Voice: Hao Asakura he is a triplet

Hao: now you've gone too far! I don't even like being a twin!

Voice : that's not my problem I just do what the authoress tells me ! Ahem Hao he sleeps with a pink blanket

Hao: (outraged) Just who are you and what do you want

Voice: I am the voice and I want to torture you! It's my job.

Hao: …. Wow you told me! You didn't lie!

Voice: (nervously) yes well……Hao Asakura... his guardian ghost is a pixie.

Hao: No its not that's Lyserg! Wait till I get my hands on you! i'll burn you to a crisp!

Voice: Bite me! You cant even find me! …Hao Asakura he is secretly going out with Chloe the pixie

Hao: what is up with you and the pixie! She's tiny!

Jeanne: (runs on to stage)oh Hao how could you!

Hao: why are you saying my name twice?

Jeanne: O.o

Voice: Security!

Inuyasha: (Jumps on to stage and drags Jeanne away)

Hao: That was …awkward…

Voice : enough of your babblings ..

Hao: hey looks who's talking about babbling! Talk about looking where are you?

Voice : that's not important, what's important is that Hao Asakura is a tight rope walker!

Hao: you really aren't torturing me you know

Voice : Hao Asakura is two timing Chloe the pixie and Hermione Granger!

Hao: how did you know I was ….. I mean Lies!

Voice : You are dating her!

Hao: (spiting sparks ) LIES!

Voice: Ha ha ha ha yha

Audience: HAhahahaha

Hao: (teary eyed) lies!

Voice: (talking to some one in mobile) do I have to come home now mom! (clears throat) I mean that's all for today folks

Hao: What? There's an audience here! (looks at audience for first time)

Yoh: ( waves from the audience) hey! Bro!

Hao: ….. I cant believe this

Voice: hey we are on live television! Any way now you know Hao Asakura who two time pixies and witch's not to mention the iron maiden –

Hao: _she_ is after_ me_!

Voice: he is legally blonde ,sleeps with a pink blanket! And has married farm yard animals!

Hao: Huh? What? They don't know me! They don't know that I am going to be shaman king one day-

Voice: in your dreams!( as the light fades away on a distressed Hao ,still strapped to the chair.)

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On a dark stage at 7 o'clock the custodian is mopping the stage when he sees a figure lolling in his sleep muttering about his plans to burn 'that voice'

Janitor: who's there?

Hao: (wakes up) at last some one to free me, release me custodian or I will hurt you!

Janitor: (releases Hao from chair)

Hao: (stumbles off stage)

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Headcase7: Well ….. tell me if you like it! Read and review please!


	2. Ch2 Victimtwo: Tao Ren

Goody I got 4 reviews!

Anyway I love writing humor fics (and I had some spare time, heh heh)

Disclaimer: Oh yeah I don't own shaman king or any other characters from any other publications! I don't own the TV I watch them on!

Here's the next one : laughs evilly at the thought of poor Tao subjected to the abuse of the voice!

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Know your _stars..._I mean SK characters!

Victim 2: Tao Ren

A black haired Chinese boy walked on to a stage. He looked around, surprised. Seeing a gold framed chair with red cushions on it he thought of sitting down but then walked by.

Suddenly something white caught the corner of his eye. A bottle of milk was sitting on the chair. Ren's mouth watered at the sight of the clear glass bottle, he went over, sat down on the chair and began to drink the milk. A disembodied voice echoed.

"Know your stars, Know your stars, Knows your stars."

Ren leapt up from the chair spilling the milk over himself—well he tried to but it was as if an invisible bond kept him tied to the chair.

Ren: Hey! What's the big idea! Let me go who ever you are! Why can't I get up (struggling to move)

Voice: You have drunk the magical milk from the sea cows! Now you are stuck to this chair till I release you!

Ren: O.o

Hao: (off stage) Hey! You told the truth again!

Voice:(In official tone) it's a job requirement I have to say at least 1 or 2 true sentences and that's concludes that requirement!

Hao: heh heh-on

Ren: Hey what's going what do you mean?

Hao: (still offstage) Don't listen to him Ren he—(is cut off by security)

Voice: moving on Tao Ren is not really Chinese … he's English.

Ren: What I only have an English _accent _in the dub!

Voice: Tao Ren he hates cows!

Ren: No actually I love them they provide me with my vital life force!

Hao: (some how manages to ditch Inuyasha) hey are you running out of ideas cos I swear you said something to me about cows!

Voice: I said Moving on ! (while shouting in the other mike for security! Even though we cant see him) AS I said before Tao Ren hates cows!

Ren : nooooooo! I luv my precious cows!( still not angry because he is state of shock)

Voice: Oh really then why did I have a certain Ainu come to me with a picture of a cow dilapidated by you!

Ren: Huh? Horo Horo?

Voice: No it was a girl came to me quite late almost midnight!

Ren: NOOOOO! Prika how could you?

Prika: (Suddenly appears on stage) what? I didn't do anything! Renny-Chan!

Ren: (spike growing) I told you ot to call me that in public!

Voice: SECURITY!

A red and white blur whizzed on to stage and off, disappearing with Prika.

Voice: ( All smug at security efficiency) Tao Ren he has a sword… attached to his head!

Ren ( gigantanourmous vein pulsing on head) I! DO! NOT! It's my hair style!

Voice : It's a sword if I say so !

Ren: just because you say it doesn't make it true!

Voice: does too!

Ren: does not!

Voice: does too!

Ren: does not!

Voice: does too!

Ren: does not!

Voice: does too!

Ren: does not!

Voice: does toooo ! Ill see to it that there is a sword attached to your head! Stitch! Attach a sword to his head!

Alien 626 comes on to stage dragging sword of light. Spits on Ren's head and attaches sword after saying " iiee gaa naga quista!" walks off

Voice: Now you have sword on your head ( grins like a baby even though we cant see it)

Ren : Mmpph! ( cant talk because head is pushed on to lap because of the weight of the sowrd)

Voice: Ahem Stitch you can take it off now( sheepishly because " how can he torture him if he cant talk!")

626: ( removes sword )

Ren: ( gasp!)

Voice: Tao Ren he actually Jack Spicer dressed up as a Chinese boy!

Ren: ( red with anger now!) OOOOO! When I get my hands on you! You, you, you, you you'll be sorry!

Voice: How? I already have your Kwan Dao! And your guardian ghost!

Ren: O.o Noooooooooooo!

Bason: ( off stage) Master help! I'm in the dungeons!

Ren: This place has dungeons?

Voice: yes we had them renovated!

Ren: Really? My uncle renovated the dungeons I was held in ! all skeletons and rats quite horrible!

Voice well our are a little more conventional!...

Bason: ( still off stage) Gah! Their torturing me with cute little Telitubies!

Ren : (Anger returning!) Let him go!

Voice: ( still prattling on about dungeons and color schemes) and the things we are doing in the fields of torture are fascinating! Huh? Let him go? How rich! Mwahahahahahahah!

Audience: O.o

Ren: O.o

Bason: O.o

Telitubies: O.o

Security/ Inuyasha: O.o

( cricket chirps)

Voice: Mwha hahahahah! Tao Ren he is also Luke's father!

Luke Skywalker: My father!

Ren : who the hell are you!

Luke: But your not some dude in a mask breathing funny! Where that damn script!

Inuyasha: (Tiredly takes him off stage)

Voice: And now you know Tao Ren! A boy with a sword on his head, who is English , hates cows and is actually Jack spucer and Darth Vader in disguise!

Ren: ( struggling ) Nooo! They don't They? Whose they? Anyway Come down her and fight like a man !or voice or whatever you are! ( confusedly now)

Voice: I need some coffee Tina! Ahh… I mean ……. that is to say…. That's all for today folks! Tune in next time for a look at the Ainu Prika!

The light fades on a dripping with milk Tao running around the stage ! Being chased by telitubies!

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Headcase7:That was great ! will update I a weeks time ! tooodles


	3. Ch3 Victim three: Prika

Sorry it took so long but school started and then I have fire breathing teachers :no pun intended: breathing down my neck for hw …. In probably boring you….. so here victim three: laughs manically:

Am I evil or am I evil?...oh yeah almost forgot but not quite : smirks at lawyers:

Disclaimer: I don't nor will I ever own any thing!got that!

Hope de hopehope its long enough!

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Victim three: Prika (hahahaha)

We see a stage and a purple modern looking chair, the audience is quite.

A little whispering can be heard, an audience member coughs… a baby cries.

Voice: She what?

More whispering.

Voice you mean to tell me our victim for today got side tracked!

Whispering: (you're on air!)

Voice: Ah I mean…. That is to say… our guest for today will be a little late but she'll be here (to someone) Right?

Whispering: (nods)

Voice: yes that's right! She should be arriving soon!

(Cricket chirps) (Some one coughs again)

Voice: in the mean time here's a word from our sponsor!

(Creepy music play)

(Screen opens up on stage and the outline of a dark short figure can be seen)

Creepy person (me): yes that's right I am the uh… auth-..uh..Sponsor and I'd like to say thanks for coming!

(Creepy music plays again and screen folds over and slots in to the wall)

Audience: …..

(Cricket chirps)

Voice: shut of that stupid bug tape! I mean how about a break!

(Screen folds out again)

Voice two: Do want to go that extra mile to make your head look shiny?

Several bald guys in audience: Yess!

Voice Two: Then you need skull shine, the cream to shine your head!

Aang/Avatar: (holding bottle of skull shine which may I add had a nuclear sign on it!) I used it and got the job for Avatar!

(Smiles while head sparkles)

Voice two: ( all official now) Not for use by children ,sprits, animals prince Zuko or Opacho.

Zuko: (from audience) hey!

Prika: (runs on to stage) run away! the candy marshy is coming! (Then sees chair and sits down) hmm? Isn't this where I saw Renny-chan?

Voice: Oh are we back again?

Whispering

Voice: ( clears throat ) ahem! Know your stars know your stars know your stars

Prika: What your who?

Voice: ( mutter about stupid Ainu's )

Prika: (narrows eyes ) what did you say? Where are you?

Voice: Prika... She likes to eat teddy bear stuffing.

Prika: no I don't dude! (Looks around for source of voice)

Voice: Prika she dressed up her brother as a girl and sent him on a blind date while he was sleeping using a walkie-talkie to make him talk!

Prika: ( gulp) ooooh I knew I'd have nightmares about that!

Voice: its true ? Ha!

Ryu: (from audience) (gasp!) I knew you cousin Horia Horia kept falling in her spaghetti!

Voice: it was Horo Horo you dolt!

Ryu: (gag!) you mean I made out with a dude?

Horo Horo: (dead faint back stage, hopefully forgetting the horrible truth)

Ren+ Hao+ Bason+ Inuyasha+ teletubies: (snigger)

Prika: I'm soo soo sorry onii-chan I couldn't help it! ( teary eyes)

Voice: enough! Prika was also at Funbari inn on Tuesday night!

Prika: (angry) I was not! I was at Re-

Anna: (backstage) I knew you wanted me out of the house for a reason!

Yoh: (also back stage) Anna! Prika never came anywhere near me! Nothing happened (to advancing itako)

(Legendary left hand slap)

Prika: (small voice ) I'm soo sorry Yoh but I wasn't at the inn on Tuesday!

Voice: Any way... Prika she is also two timing Ren!

Ren: (back stage) what?

Voice: ( gossip mode) yes and the lucky guy or should I say unluky guy is Aang!

Several bald people in the audience: noo! Not out idol! ( cry anime tears)

Aang: (leaps on to stage )

Prika : who?

Katara +Toph+ Azula: ( also) (**A/N I know Azula doesn't like Aang but I couldn't help it hee hee)**

Ren: ( also! Leaps on to stage ) sheees miiineeee!

Aang : no shees mine!

Ren+ Aang: (fight for Prika)

Katara +Toph Azula: ( fight for Aang because it s a trend and its funn!)

Voice: (mutters I really need to hype up on security….. (Bellows) SECURITY!

Aang+Ren+Katara+Toph+Azula: (dragged of stage)

Voice: Prika she has a huge crush on Lyserg!

Prika: YOU LIE!

Voice: Ya doooo!

Prika: liar liar pants on fire!... Uh do you even have pants voice?

Voice: (offended tone) hmmph! Yes I do and why do you call me voice I have a name ya know!

Prika: you really do have a name! What?

Voice: it's Mary-Anne if you must know!

Prika: What I thought you were a man? (Snort) Marry-Anne! (Starts laughing!)

Voice: I am it was my mothers Idea! So I renamed my self rocky!

Prika: rocky as in the boxer?

Voice: precisely and I would like it if some people referred to me as that! (Looks at some creepy person)

Me: Fine! Rocky it is! (Mutters "there not going to like this!")

Rocky: Any way on with the uh... show …… uh... Prika

Prika: Yess (drools)

Rocky: (twiddles fingers yes you guessed it we cant see him!) I was uh... Wondering... Will you go out with me?

Prika: (shiny eyes) yessss!

Rocky: Yay!( coughs sinisterly) on with the show Prika is actually a fat marsh mellow!

Prika: (out raged) oh! I wont noww! (crosses arms and looks away)

(MY uninsane half: um… away from where? Me: The audience maybe)

Rocky: oooo! You are a marsh mellow!

Prika: uh.. did you say marshmallow?( gets up from purple chair)

Rocky: hey how did you get up?

Prika: huh?

Rocky: I thought you were tied to it!

Prika: uh… no I wasn't dude.

Rocky: You mean to tell me you were sitting through all my torture by your own free will!

Prika: uh…. Yeah…(runs offstage)

Rocky: wow well now you know Prika!

Marshy: (the giant marshmallow man walk or thumps on to stage) Marshy want to eat Prika! (goes after Prika)

Rocky/voice: I think…. that maybe we should not have seen that!

Light fades on stage to sound of applause and sound of Ren and Aang (also Katara Toph and Azula)fighting off stage to the amusement of Hao, Inuyasha and of course how could we forget the telitubies! Horo Horo poor dear, was still in dead faint! But woke up later and went to the toilet we will be seeing him next time in Know your stars of a little thing I like to call the Sk charaters revenged……..

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A/N: yesss it is finally completed ! ( laghes head of for no apparent reason well may be I am high on coke(ahem as in coca cola!)…)

Hopefully I will update tommoro but maybe next week!  :)


	4. Ch 4 victim 4: Horo Horo

Sorry sorry sorry! I am hopeless at typing and soo that's why this update is soo late :: grumbles "stupid teachers when will I need trig in my life??":: the are plaguing it on to us , the hw I mean….. .

This chapter is dedicated to onii-chan he was the inspiration for this victim, heh heh

Disclaimer: yeah don't own nothing…

and so know the long awaited chapter

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Victim 4: Horo Horo special edition!/ Hao's revenge(already?)

The light shines on an empty stage.

Voice: what? Do you mean he cant come ? I need some one to torture!!

Whispering.

Voice: damn Aniu's all the same!!(Grumbles some more, then clears throat) ahem ! Today ladies and gents we will have a special edition where we will go to our vic- er.. I mean star through our special camera..

Me: really?

Voice: oh don't act like you didn't plan all this!!

Me:…..

Screen folds open on stage and we see the contents of a bath room. There is a bath a sink and a toilet. Sitting on this toilet is a spiky blue haired boy, sleeping.

Voice: so that's why we couldn't reach him?

Horo Horo: (wakes up) who ho? What where?( just so you know we can only see his torso and the bottom of his leg I aint that perverted!)

Voice: know your stars X3

Horo Horo : what your who?

Voice: seriously your sister asked the same question!!

Ren: (back stage sniggers)

Prika: (also back stage hit him on the head) renny!!!

Horo Horo: (holding toilet seat ) what the hell is going on ?? why do I hear people??

Voice: I am the grim reaper come to take you away into the night!

Every one: (falls over)

Horo Horo : hanh?

Voice: any way before I do I must tell you some truths about yourself!... Horo Horo has a huge crush on Tamao!

Horo Horo : (blush blush)

Ren : O.o every one knows that except you two!!!

Voice : what? But you said he would hate it!!

Me: Hey nobody's perfect!!

Voice: my mom is!!

Me: dude ! she named you marry-ann!!

Voice: its Rocky!!

Me: ookay then rocky (snort) on with the show then rocky! (sniggers can be heard)

Voice: Horo Horo he flirts with kororo!

Horo Horo : no I don't and what the hell is going on ! why do I hear voices in my toilet!!! (looks around)

Kororo: …..

Voice: Horo Horo he licks the toilet bowl!

Audience : eww!!!!

Horo Horo: (blue in the face with anger) what the hell are you talking about? I'm not a dog!

Anna: (back stage eyebrow raised) your not?

Horo Horo : (positively terrified) I – I mean of course I am! I'm a total mutt!!

Anna: that's right!

Prika : hmmph!

Voice/Ren / Telitubies/ Inuyasha: (snigger)

Hao: ( no where to be seen or heard)

Voice: Horo Horo he ate every thing.

Horo Horo: huh?

Audience: …..

Voice : every thing before the dinosaurs! You get it?in fact he was the reason they went extinct!!

Audience: …..

Horo Horo: when I'm finished you'll be finished too!!

Voice: Horo Horo he :beep beep: poor Jun!

Ren : why you?!?!?

Horo Horo: no way ! shes too old!

Audience: (gasp gasp)

Jun: whaah! Whaah! Even Boro Boro doesn't like me!!

Voice: hey I thought you said Ren would be more angry!?!?

Ren: (back stage)who do you keep talking to?

Me: (from a big balcony near the room ) never you mind!! Try the other one!

Voice: oh yeah Horo Horo he stole Ren's milk!!

Ren: (jumps through the screen into bathroom)

Horo Horo: (stands up cos he's finished but we don't t anything sorry Horo fans!! )

Ren: (attacks Horo) you can insult me ! you can :beep: my sister but you cant and I mean cant steal my milk!!! Yaaaah! (attacks with Quan Dao)

Me: too bad Hao-sama isn't here to remind him you only lie!(munches popcorn and watches fight

Voice: yeah! Okay now security!

Telitubies: (come in to bath room and tear fighting shaman apart!)

Ren/Horo Horo: gah!!! Telitubies run!!!

Voice: now Horo sit back on the toilet

Horo: huh?

Voice: (le sigh) security…..

Inuyasha: (from control booth) deploy agents lala dinky winky and poh I need to get my doggy biscuits from tipsy!

Telitubies tie up Horo to toilet

Voice: activate toilet teleporter eegor!

Inuyasha : my name is Inuyasha !! inu- ya-sha-!!1 just cos in the chief security does not mean you can call me eegor you loon

Voice: ahem just press the purple button inu-yasha,,,,,,…… .

Inuyasha: gladly! (presses button) now where's my coffee tipsy??

Horo horos toilet bowl suddenly materializes on stage Horo still clinging to it and the telitubies as well. The telitubies then tie Horo to the toilet tighter

Horo Horo: gah! Their touching me!!! (bites poh on the antennae) take that you antennae-ied spawn of Satan!!

Voice: hmp! My name is rocky and your sister wanted to go out with me!

Horo Horo : I was talking to the walking fat bags and your telling me that why?

Voice: Horo Horo he is dumb!

Horo Horo: why you!!! Kororo into the….. Kororo?

Voice: oh she and Chloe are off on a double date!

Horo Horo: my guardian ghosts a les? O.o

Voice: oh no she's with manta and Chloe with Hao.

Lyserg: Chloe??? How could you??? (teary eyed)

Hao: (back stage) I'm right here dude??( then vanishes again)

Prika: (backstage) oh Lyserg-chan is soo cut when he is angry!

Ren: O.o (yeah you guessed he too is back stage ) _Lyserg-chan?_

Voice: moving on!!his name is actually …

Horo horo: let me guess?? Boro boro right?(rolls eyes) every one makes fun of that!

Me&voice: no its not!!!

Voice: its Zelda the flower bat! (-)

Horo Horo :O.o dude you and that other kid you are seriously whacked!!

Me: don't I know it! -

Voice: sorry people we are gonna have to rap this up ! we are getting a new stage and this one is due to be demolished in half an hour and because we are low on funds coughllillyjustusedthemoneycough could please leave money in the collection box for uh… collection (a/n I'm running out of words…..) so now you know Zelda the flower bat! who is a fascist fishest zebra who tampers with dresses!! Run for your life! This place is about to go up in rubble! (takes breath)

Me: was that just me or was that the longest thing you ever spoke? And don't you mean smoke?

Voice : no….

Ren: (dumps Prika to go of with a bunch of Ocs )

Prika: (kisses Lyserg)

Voice: sorry to break up this extremely hurried love fest /soap but we are out of time…

Everyone: (runs)

5 mins later ….

Hao: (jumps on to stage)hahaha YOU WILL PAY NOW ROCKY!!!haha (sets the stage afire) and the (runs away)

Mw: sadly only 4 people or rather "bags of fat" aka tubies (waves goodbye)

Telitubies: (scorched corpses fall to the ground be side coffee table security dental plans forgotten)

Me: (reappears on burning stage) also because of Hao's little stunt the stage was destroyed and the money went to rocky's

mothers foot surgery:(

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I have made some corrections ! to this chapter… Prika kisses Lyserg not Ren….. just so you know……

Also I will update on 2 more reviews so review and those reviewing arigato!! Please review my un-reviewing readers!!!

Once again arigato and until next time!!


	5. Ch 5 victim 5: Yoh Asakura

Hey! Thanks all who reviewd!!alot!!

Yes I'm updating again this fast because I have a Halloween chapter after this one - and we have half term soo I can do some good updates

Disclaimer: I;m walking through a crowed street full of faceless figure when this man comes up to me and tells me "you now own shaman king!' I start to jumps up and down going "really???" and then he says "wake up now honey its time to go to school" also he turns into my mom soooo I hope you get it now that I don't nor ever will own shaman king!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm soo happy now we have half-term!! I'm away from school! because soo frustrating to know that no one and I mean nooo one in my school (population :600) knows what anime is??!?!?! Can you believe that!?

Okay now I'm probably boring you soo here the nxt chappy! -

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Victim 5: Yoh Asakura

The stage is dark and we can see Yoh sleeping in a orange chair.

Voice: Know your stars! Know your stars! Know your stars!

Yoh: ZZZZ(lullaby plays)

Voice: I said Know your stars know your……..

Yoh: ZZZZ (dun dun dun dundun daa daa dun dun (rock-by-baby) dum dun dum dun dun dun dundun)

Voice: new security!!

Inuyasha: they're missing…

Whispering!

Voice: damn payrolls! Any way Yoh Asakura he is an accountant!

Yoh: ZZZZZ (lullaby plays)

Voice: (frustrated) I said a hard working, non-easy going and un-lazy accountant!!!!

Yoh: ZZZZ (lullaby play while he sleeps like a baby)

Voice: (sigh) Yoh Asakura loves Anna! He's a green eyed pussy! He takes piggy back rides on Amidamaru !! HE KILLED ELVIS!! Ahh! I give up! end of show I'm beat!

Me: hheheh! Nii-chans too sweet to sweet to get tortured rocky (evil grin) yet!!

Voice: (rubs hands together like evil lab assistant) you mean I will get second chance??

Me: maaaaaybe! 0

Me+voice: (evil maniacal laughter!) mwahahahah!

Me: you better hope I feel random!!

Voice: hai! Oh great Lilly-sama!!!

Me: good dog !...I mean..er.. rocky!! Heheh(looks around) hey why are you talking to me we're on air!!!!

Voice+me: (look at Yoh)

Yoh: (drool snore) ZZZZZ (lullaby music)

Anna: (backstage slaps head) how I agreed to marry him I have no clue?!?!?!

Voice: well that's all folks see you next time!!!

Lights fade and Yoh gets up

Yoh: huh? Who? What? Oranges and green socks !! Lyserg!! Jun! Jeanne's red eyes!! Ren eyes!! Ren has a spike on his hair! I like my hair ! I like Anna's hair! I like HAIR! and I like HALloOwEEn!!!(falls back to sleep!)

Everyone+ Me+ voice+ telitubie ghosts +new and old security : (falls over anime style!!)

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Yeah I know that wasn't long enough but if I get 4 or 5 reviews then I'll update the Halloween special!!! Now I must watch you tube arigato for reviewing!! -

Please r and r !!! - happy early Halloween!!!! -


	6. Ch 6 victim6:hanagumiXamidmaru halloween

YAY!! Soo many reviews!! I'm soo happy since its Halloween of course duh!!

And sorry the last chapter was small seemingly unnecessary but it was really a filler chapter this is the real deal I'm really giving an arm and a leg(aka hours on the internet for the coming week!) to get this to you so be grateful if not, review!! Flames accepted!!

Disclaimer: look if I owned any thing I wouldn't be writing on fan fiction?? Kay?? I wouldn't have to since it would be mine, and I could do whatever I want with it (itshaman king) but it's not mine is it and soo I'm writing fan fiction!! You get it?? No? yes? I don't care!!

Let us begin!!oh also another thing every one is in audience.

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Chapter 6: Halloween special

Victim 6's: Amidamaru, Hanagumi and what ever else comes into my candy crazed mind!!! bwhahahaha (cough cough)

Yoh was strapped to a chair. Anna was approaching with a flash light held under her face.(thanks to mooncrest for this suggestion!!)

Yoh: uh… um.. Anna ?? is that you?

Anna:….

Yoh: why do you have white powder on your face?? Anna?? What are you doing what?? Ah!!!!!!!

Yoh: (wakes up) man! That was a scary nightmare!! (goes back to sleep)

Voice: . ……. And now my dear audience I present to you the Hanagumi!!

Mari, Machi and Kanna are sidled out in identical silver chairs

Machi: what the hell is going on??

Mari: Mari no like this!!

Kanna: grr!!

Voice: know your stars know your stars know your stars!!!!

Mari: O.o

Machi: O.o

Kanna: grr!!!

Voice: ahem (clears throat appropriately!) you the Hanagumi are accused of forming an illegal les marriage!

Machi: WTF!!!!!!!!!! Where are you?? (cranes neck to ,look around)

Mari: Mari don't know what that is? what is that Mari want to know??

Kanna: grr!!

Me: rocky shuddup!!!!

Voice: (death glares at me although no one can see) Mari she is actually brain dead!

Mari : Mari no barn fed!! Mari eat at Hao-sama's restaurant!!! (nods head)

Machi: er…. No Mari he meant-

Voice: Kanna she is a slut!!

Everyone: …

Some one coughs.

Me: give it up rocky!!

Audience: (shout agreement!)

Voice: (curls up I a corner) mommy!

Me: (starts breathing fire and brimstone and appears in a devil costume on stage) mwhahahaha hahah! (cough) maybe the cough was over doing it?? Anyway we got him!!

Voice: (sucks thumb or we can hear sucking noise any way) who??

Me: you know (then looks around) now take it away rocky!! (exists)

Voice: (recovers) shut them aside security!!

Inuyasha: (pushes Hanagumi chair to the side…)

Kanna: gr!!

Machi: hey watch it dog breath!!

Mari : (claps hands) yay!! Mari likes rides!! (how the hell did her hands get free any way???)

Voice: and today we have as our other special guest curtsy of our great author……..

Me: (returns) say it!!

Voice: (grumble grumble) oh alright!!!... Curtsy of our great author lilly-sama soon to be Mrs. Tao (snort) we will have a ghoast in today for Halloween !! Provided by her Halloween powered devil powers coughannashelpcough!!! Here ya happy??

Me: (delighted) yess!!! Hahaha!(giggle giggle then leaves for tric-o-treating)

Prika: (scowl scowl)

Amidamaru: (appears in blue chair through trap door) hey! Let go! What's going on?? Master Yoh? What are you doing here?? (looks at sleeping Yoh in other chair then at Hanagumi behind him)

Yoh: (sleeping ) ZZZZZZZ

Voice: um… leave him there…

Hanagumi: Grrr!!

Amidamaru: O.o

Voice: know your star know your star know your star!!

Amidamaru: (still concernedly looking at Yoh)….

Voice: (mutters) that always has such a dramatic affect , gotta improve rocky this is a challenge!! He's a ghost you can take 'em!!

Machi: who are you talking to?

Voice: ah..uh nothing…. Amidamaru he-

Amidamaru: may I ask a question??

Voice: (nervous) um… yeah?

Amidamaru: Why are there four girl creeping through the door with "Go Zeke we love you!!!" written on there shirts??

Voice: Um….

Hao: (stands up and looks at them) gah!! Not again!! And they didn't even get my name right (stars running out the back door only to be caught by the same fan girls)

Hao: ( high pitched scream pierces night air)

Far off….

Me: (to candy person) hold the though I'll be back to ask you exactly why you are giving me an apple??(runs to Hao's aid) hiya! You crazies!! (kungfu's fan girls )

Hao: thanks (cute smile)

Me: anything for you niisama!! Now you get back in there and stay till I come back !! I don't wanna lose any candy!!!! grr!!! (leaves )

Hao: (chibhified ) sorry….

Back on stage.

Voice: as I was saying Amidamaru you are Mr. Toad the car stealing hooligan!!

Amidamaru: who?

Voice: you know from wind in the willows?? Ah!! Forget it!! You're a black friar who serves the elf queen!!

Amidamaru: who?

Kanna: eh?

Machi: this is getting ridiculous!!

Mari: yay! Mari like ride!!

Machi: where were you??

Mari: oh dog boy was playing with Mari. Mari like the ride!!!

Inuyasha: (falls down ) no.. more …piggy back… you're ..heavy!!

Mari: (laughs and jumps on to said dog)

Voice : getting back to the show! Amidamaru you are a buffalo! And in fact you are a purple haired water buffalo!!

Amidamaru: who?

Voice: (smacks head then calls me) hello you have reached Lilly's devil hot line I am unavailable right now please leave a message after the maniacal laughter!!! Mwhahahahahahahahaha!!

Voice: (grumble grumble)

Me: (steps on to stage) finally finished!! And now to change costume and do it all over again!!

Voice: there you are!! oh all knowing author it wont work!! (Note sarcasm)

Amidamaru: who?

Voice: seee!!1 that's all he'll say!!!

Me: easily remedied!! Just dance out a couple of tap-dancing necromancers in front of him and he'll be fine! (leaves in cat costume for more trick-o-treating)

Voice: O.o how will that help?? Wait!!!... oh! Well!

Faust clone army: (like in star wars only with faust)(march out on stage with Eliza clone on either side)

Machi: now that's wrong!!

Kanna: agreed!

Mari: dog boy no play with Mari no more dog boy lie on ground!!

Inuyasha : meep!

Amidamaru: aaahhh!!!! The horror!!!

Voice: that's more like it!! Amidamaru you are a girl!!

Amidamaru: no I'm not !!! who are you ?? where are you??

Voice: (warning: Halloween moment!!) uh..me.. I'm the wicked witch of the west!!! nyhahaha

Amidamaru: come again??

Yoh: zzzzz

Anna: (bonks head in audience) why why me???

Voice: here we go again!! Bring out the clones!!

Fausts: (come on stage doing the can-can!!)( then don't leave)

Voice: security!!

Inuyasha : (miraculously healthy again) um.. they want there special name…

Voice: oh all right x-laws fight evil!!!

X-laws(Jeanne, Marco, mina, and some other people..): (jump on to stage and remove can-caners)

Hao: hide me ! Jeanne is after me ever since that rocky told her I went out with granger which I didn't she'd after me!! (hide's behind Anna who is plotting on a revenge for Yoh)

Voice: good job X-laws!!

Audience:…………

Yoh: ZZZZZ

Amidamaru: who?

Voice: I don't believe this!!?!?!? (bangs head )

Me: (appears on stage in cat costume) hwhaha haha good hawl this year!! (shakes candy bag) I don't need you guys any more(kikyo, will, blunk, prince zuko, naruto and all of his gang also the DBZ people fall out of bag )

Me: you can all sit in the audience like mee!! (sits next to Ren )

Bag people: (sit in audience shuffling quitly and muttering about candy apples darkly) (A/n there all dressed up for Halloween as them selves as in overly dressed)

Voice: can we uh.. get back to.. the uh… fanfic please?

Amidamaru : who??

Audience/ everbody: YOU!!!! You dolt!!! You!!!

Amidamaru: all that?? That was about me??

Everyone/ audience: YESSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Amidamaru: WHY YOU!!! I'm NO SERVANT OF SOME ELF QUUEN AND NEITHER AM I MISTER TOAD! I HOLD GREAT RESPECT FOR THE MAN BUT

Voice: now we're getting some where!!

Me : unfortunately I' have run out of time and can hear my mom approaching to tell me to "SHUT OF That COMPUTER!!" also I have a need … a neeed t to indulge my self in all that marshmellowy goodness!!! Bwhahaha bwhahahaha

Voice: nooooooo!!!

Amidamaru: noooooo!!!

Hao: nooooooo!!

Lyserg: (in act of putting glue in Hao's hair gel , caught by X-laws)

Me: what's wrong niisama??

Hao: I wont be able to tell what part rocky told the truth about??

Me: well that depends on the reviewers and what they think!!! -

* * *

Me: okay so we aren't done what happened after we left them??

Dun dun dunnnnnn

Voice: ann-I mean lilly release them!!

Me: what did you say?!?!?

Voice: er… what I said said was oh please Lilly-sama please release Amidamaru ..and away from me too please..

Me: fine….(release's Amidamaru) well what do we do now??

Voice: huh?

Me: you baka!!! This place is sooo empty now the "audience" has left what do we doo now??

Voice: call my mom and have a supervised party??

Me: uh!!! You dooofusss!!! Your mom?? She cant even move!!! Forget it!! We'll just have a normal party!!!!!!

* * *

And you can guess what happens next since all the anime people are still there!!! Heheheh

Okay I don't think I'll be updateing for some time now , but reviews can change my mind!!!!and please give me some ideas cause I'm out of them!!!also while your reviewing take a guess at what it was that rocky told the truth about??

Happy Halloween!!

R and R please and you get CANDY!!!!

P.S. sorry if there are any spelling mistakes I did this in a hurry!!!


	7. Ch 7 Victim 7 : Lyserg Diethel

People I agree I have taken forever to update and I'm sorry! I cant do anymore! I'll try to update faster this year as I have no exams!

Disclaimer: yeah I own Shaman king and Marco's can fly….

And now the long awaited chapter of **Know your stars I mean Shaman king characters.**

**Victim 7: Lyserg Diethel**

Lyserg Diethel ran onto a stage the rest of the X-laws had stopped chasing him now. Stopping to catch his breath he saw a chair on top of which in spidery writing was written "Old Revengeful". AS a resting place he sat down on it for a while. AS soon as he did though giant purple spaghetti erupted from around him encasing him in the chair he looked like those arm wrapping shirts for mentally unstable people.

Lyserg: Wha-Whats happening?!

Voice: ( high pitched voice like t opera) Know your stars! Know your stars! Know your stars!

Lyserg: What?? What is this thing around me (looking at purple spaghetti)

Voice: that is special spaghetti. .

Horo Horo: uh.. why is it ..Purple…?

Voice: Its squid venom…..

Lyserg: O.O

Voice: Take it up with the authoress...

Me: What? It's Italian week!!

Voice: . Right... well folks its another show now you'll know your star Lyserg Diethel. Lyserg Diethel he just escaped from the Pharmacy!

Lyserg: (looks around) who said that? What going on?

Voice: ahem Lyserg Diethel he likes going to the girls room rather than the boys!

Lyserg: (eyes widened) If that's you Hao I'll get you! You hear me!?!

Hao : Boo Hoo! I'm right here you Baka! ( waves from the audience) Rocky's the one talking!

Voice: Precisely Lyserg Diethel he is a big piece of Broccoli!

Lyserg: (starts twitching his eye so he looks like this 0.o ) I AM NOT A PIECE OF BROCCOLI!!!!

Voice: oh yes you are! Why I your head green!

Lyserg: T.T Y-your j-just like those kids in preschool! I'm not broccoli! I'm only a boy! Mommy told me you meanies don't know ay thing my hair is green like my daddy!! (starts sobbing)

Audience: (even Hao!) Awww! (evil look at shaded glass window behind which Voice resides)

Me: what that in the script?

Voice: I improvised! So what!

Ren: who are you talking too? (confused expression)

Jeanne: Fruit throwers! Load! Throw! (Organized fruit is thrown at Rocky's window)

Voice: Alright already!! Lyserg Diethel he has been standing in for Hao's personal maid!

Lyserg: (spluttering ) wwhhaaafffttt?!?!?!?!

Voice: Lyserg Diethel he milked Hao's wife the cow for him!

Hao: now hold on just a min-

Lyserg: (Twitching starts at the mention of Hao's name) Listen hear you little wanker where ever you are! I bloody well am not from some pharmacy! I am not Hao's freaking Maid!! And I certainly am not a blinkin' piece of BROCCOLI!!

Voice: uh.. yeah you are! Hit it Igor!

Inuyasha: It's INUYASHA!! I would rather work for that Jeanne.. (Growl)

Voice: Yeah! Yeah… Inu-what's-his-ears just hit the weasel button!!

Me: Now I know that wasn't in the script!!

Ren: Aha! I figured it out!! She (points at me) is the one you keep talking to!

Voice: You're a genius!

Me: Your such a good detective Ren-Chan!!

Ren: O.O

Tamao: Ano- I thought Lyserg-kun was the detective.

Everyone: (looks at Lyserg)

Lyserg: (twitching) grr.. (imagine a rabbit kicking its legs that show fast his eye was twitching)

Voice: Inutasha!! The weasel if you please!

Inuyasha: Fine Cocky I'll just press it then…(smirks)

Voice: Grr…

Inuyasha: ooh sorry I mean Marry-Ann!!

Voice: (spitting) Just hit the Weasel!!!!

Inuyasha : (hits button with a weasel Picture on it)

A screen folds out and on it is Chocolove in a Broccoli costume wearing a Lyserg mask.

Lyserg: (left eye twitching)

Me: (mutters to Ren and Hao)How'd his left eye start twitching anyway I thought it was his right?

Hao: Don't look at me I didn't check which eyes twitches before I killed his parents…

Voice: Exhibit A Lyserg Diethel in his broccoli Alien transformed state!!

Lyserg: B-But that not meee!!

Voice: Quiet! Alien's aren't allowed to talk!

Lyserg: T-T

Voice: Next slide Inudancer!

Inuyasha : It was better when I was Security or even Igor! (flips switch)

Screen shows Lyserg eating a large plate of vegetables.

Voice Exhibit B depicts Lyserg eating inhuman amounts of vegetables thus leading us to believe that he is in fact and Alien Broccoli! InuWhats-his-face! Next!

(Lyserg entering barber shop)

Voice: (goes on for about 5 hours)

Everyone: (falling asleep)

Inuyasha : (clicking buttons in sleep every 5 seconds showing random pictures of Lyserg)

Voice: AND FINALLY!!

Everyone: (wake up)

Voice: Exhibit Q 4.2 the the Sailor Moon Button Inugrensha!

Marco appears on stage in a white chair through trap door!

Voice: tell them Marco!

Marco: ---I don't get paid enough---- Well when he used to be part of the X-Laws…well he... he used to do weird things in his sleep! Once I saw him transform into a green thing really! He was chanting "Elvis will kill you!""

Voice: thank you! Marco!

Anvil falls on Marco's head and he falls through a trap door.

Hao : Never liked him…

ME: yeah he was a bimbo!

Pirika: 0-0 Lyserg-Chan's a Broccoli alien!?!? I'm sticking back with Ren-Chan! Oooh Ren-Chan!!

Ren: (Hides behind me) meep!

Voice: So now it's proven you are a broccoli!

Lyserg: (spitting Lysergic acid) I WILL GET YOU ROCKY!! I WILL DESTROY YOU!!

Hao: hehe.. I tried that me… all I got was sleepless nights and the eternal haunting from the Tubies!!

Telitubies: Dinky Winky Lala! POH! Saaaay helloee!!

Voice: Lyserg Diethel is a Llama!! Llama! Llama!! Llama!!

Lyserg: DO I LOOK LIK E A LLAMA TO YOU!!

Voice: No but You are a Disconfigured flamingo!

Lyserg: You!! You!! You!!

Voice: Lyserg Diethel has a crush on Iron Maiden Jeanne!

Hush, Crickets chirp.

Lyserg: How'd you know….

Voice: Job requirement… hafta say at least one true thing on the show…Lyserg Diethel he enjoys Crab cakes and Jacuzzis!

Lyserg: (deep breath) I will not React! You want a bad reaction. I will remain calm and centered. (another rdeep breath

Voice : (silent)

Horo: hey anyone seen Manta?

Me Uh.. he had a tragic accident with a frying pan and a Spatula…

Horo: O.O

Ren: come to think of it where's Yoh and Anna??

Me: well Anna was holding the frying fan and Yoh the Spatula…

Horo+Ren+Hao: O.o O-O-Okay?

Voice: Lyserg Diethel he went to second base with Milly from Lily5!!

Lyserg: YOU GO TO FAR!!

Voice: so now you know Lyserg Diethel he escaped from the Pharmacy, he likes going to the girls room rather than the boys, he is a big piece of Broccoli, has been standing in for Hao's personal maid, he milked Hao's wife the cow for him, is a Llama, a Disconfigured flamingo, he enjoys Crab cakes and Jacuzzis, he went to second base with Milly from Lily5!! And he is actually Hao in disguise!!

Lyserg: (twitches at mention of Hao)

Voice: hm… Hao! Hao!! Hao!! Hao!!

Lyserg: (whole body twitching at the word Hao)

Voice: Hao. Join us next time Hao as we learn about the Hao social structure Hao of red ants!! Err.. I Hao mean Tamao!! Ciao!!

Light fades on a twitching Lyserg draped in purple spaghetti…

* * *

REVIW REVIW!! PEOPLES!!

I hope my standards haven't dropped…. Tell me if I gave any cheap laughs I will try to improve…

Send me any ideas with Tamao KYS!!


	8. Ch 8 Victim 8: Tamao Tamamura

**I'm not even gonna say sorry for the late update and I totally understand it you guys completely hate me but here it is finally…**

**Oh and also! OMIGOSH peoples I Lilly now have Glasses!! (screams) only for school though but kyaaa!!**

**Disclaimer: Today for my disclaimer I have my good friend April-Chan!!**

**Me: Say hallo! April-Chan!**

**April: ... you expect me to say 'hallo' ??**

**Me: YEAH!!!**

**April: (sigh) the things I do you for you…well then 'Hallo' LillydehmarsheMELLOWqueen don't own NUZTHING!**

* * *

**Victim 8: Tamao Tamamura**

A screen unfolds onto the stage as we view different images.

The first is single picture of Yoh smiling.

The next is Tamao Tamamura gazing with a misty eyes look.

Yoh again.

Tamao drooling.

Yoh.

Tamao drooling with love hearts in her eyes.

Yoh.

Anna, veins popping in her head.

Yoh.

Tamao tripping over her own feet and still drooling.

Tamao: (rushes onto stage) okay okay!! I'll sit in the chair!! Just P-please stop showing those pictures! (sits in a big fluffy pink chair and looks as if on the verge on tears)

Voice: Ahem-hem- must get this cough looked at- Know your stars! Know your stars! Know your stars!

Tamao: T.T

Voice: Chibi Lilly's Inc. sponsor of Know your stars –Sk would like to announce that our chief security guard Inuyasha Taisho is on a semi-permanent leave-his honeymoon with Kagome-

Fans: (Cheers)

Voice: Yess Yess our back up crew the X-laws have been picked off one by one by a certain Chinese Doushi…the ones who remain are too badly affected to continue work-

Marco: (Runs onto stage screaming in a hobo outfit) It's the Apocalypse of the Clowns!!

Tamao: (meep)

Jun: (runs after Marco) But I haven't finished your hair!!

Ren: (Sigh)

Voice: Ahem hem so as we have no security staff Chibi Lilly's Inc. has been forced Coughnotcough to hire new security. That is "Fluffy" A.K.A. Lord Sesshomaru. Oh and as well…

Prika: (in audience) KYAARRG!!

Voice: Also out custodian was given a villa in France by Hao, if you see a green reptilian thing please ignore it, oh and feel free to pet Rin.

Prika: Geoff me!! Get it off me!

Horo: (using golf club gets green thing of his sister)

Jaken: Wuuah... (Stumbles around dazed O.O)

Audience: OO

Tamao: . (sleeping)

Voice: Tamao Tamamura likes making out with a Kiwi!

Tamao: Huh! Whauh?!?!

In audience

Horo: (skeptically) Is that even possible?

Ren: I don't know? Do I look like a do around kissing fruit?!

Tamao: (timidly) Ano… we could ask Anna-san she kisses fruit she would know…

Ren+Horo: OoO!!!

Ren: What are you doing here??

Horo: Anna?!??!

Tamao: N-nothing… (Goes back onto stage)

Voice: . Tamao Tamamura has a vast belt buckle collection!

Tamao: Please! (goes Chibi) I Don't! I don't! I have a safety pin collection!!

Voice: nuh-uh! Here's proof look!

A picture of Tamao's room flashes on screen full to the brim with Belt buckles!

Tamao: DAMNATION! What did you do with my safety pins!!

Audience: o-okay.. 0w0

Voice: Tamao Tamamura likes to prank call Manta!

Manta: 0o0 It was you!! So an evil Swedish unicorn isn't after me after all!! I'm never gonna believe you Hao!

Tamao: I-I d-didn't do it!!

Hao: v.v there's a frying pan behind you!

Manta: that happened last episode.. I'm not that gullible…

SMASH!

Anna: (hits manta with a frying pan)

Manta: Ack!! What was that??

Tamao: Manta-kun are you alright!(gets up to see manta)

Voice: GET back or its blackmail once more!

Anna: I was being nice….

Everyone: Eh?

Anna: to Hao…V.V

Fan girls : (cheers)

Voice: Tamao Tamamura is in a secret support group to help her with her nervousness.

Tamao: I-Its not a support group it's a cult.

Voice: Um..Right..

Tamao: To..To RID THIS WORLD OF TESTOSTERONE!!

Everyone: (quite)

A cricket chirps…

Tamao: (raging) The Amazons WILL RISE AGAIN!!!(Stands up and becomes a very buff woman!)

Everyone: WTF? OO

Horo: meep!

Tamao: (suddenly calms down and sits in chair like a timorous rabbit)

Voice: Okay then… Tamao Tamamura is actually 'Ugly Betty'!!!

DUN DUN DUN DUNNN

Tamao: (gasp!) I-I'm not! And please don't call my pen friend Ugly!! She's really quite pretty!! And besides she looks like Lilly-san's friend April-san…

April: rite… everyone's a comedian….

Me: Really it's quite a resemblance!

April: (gives me a death glare in her new glasses)

Voice: You so are Ugly Betty I have proof!!

Me: Rocky that kind of defeats the purpose…

Voice: oh well.. rite…. Tamao Tamamura is really blonde she fell in to a bucket of pink tooth paste when she was a kid!

Tamao: (gasp!) Your so-so mean!! I am not blonde I'm Albino!!

Voice: So you're not denying the fact that you fell in to a bucket of pink tooth paste??

Tamao: Nope! (Kawaii smile)

Voice: And you really are blonde??

Tamao: I'm ALBINO!!

Voice: Okay Okay calm down you're supposed to be the shy one… sheesh... I don't get paid enough for this…Tamao Tamamura she is really Marilyn Monroe!

Tamao: You got me there... (Takes of wig and Marilyn Monroe appears)

Voice: Wtf??

Audience: (gasp gasp)

Horo: NO way NOWAY! I made out with Marilyn Monroe!!!

Everyone: Um…

Tamao/Marilyn: (shrugs and walks of stage)

Voice: uh… well now you know Marilyn Tamamura or is it Tamao Monroe… the Kiwi kissing, Belt buckle collecting , Amazon princess, prank calling, into bucket of pink tooth paste falling, Blonde!

Tamao: (off stage) ALBINO!!

Voice: yeah that…

Unruly fan girl: (jumps on to Ren) I want to marry you!!

Ren: Aarrgghh!! (Tries to run away)

Sesshomaru: (appears behind fan girl) I suggest you remove your self from this mortal's person before I slice you in half…

Unruly Fan girl: Meep! (Runs away)

Sesshomaru: (disappears)

Ren: Efficient!

Voice: Nifty! The expressionless face must come in handy!

Me: Ah! Fluffy! (Hearts in eyes) how happy I am that I struck a deal with that Rin… (Smiles dreamily)

Voice: Well that's it for today Folks because school has eaten the authors brain… see ya next time for Know your stars Manta style!

Manta: Oh Noooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!

April: Adios Amigos!

Me: Ja ne! Don't forget to review and give me ideas for Manta!! Now I have Math's and French Homework to do!! gah!! Kill the French how I hate it!!

* * *

**P.S. – No Purple Swedish unicorns were harmed or insulted in the making of this chapter; they were how ever studied in close detail along with Asakura Hao by the author. Also the incident of the pink tooth paste was actually recreated using food coloring and Sasuke Uchiha as a stand in Tamao!**

**Thank you all good night!**

**REVIEW OR THE BUNNIES WILL GET YOU!!**


	9. Ch 9 Victim 9: Oyamada Manat

**I'm back!! Mwahahaha!! Although this is my last update until the xmas Hols…**

**This chappie is dedicated to Karin-Ochibi-Chan for being such a faithful reviewer and a good inspiration!**

**Disclaimer:**

**Me: Nii-Chan is doing my disclaimer today because he's bored and wouldn't quit bugging me.**

**Rikubi-nii-Chan: Roses are Red Violets are blue Onee-Chan don't own shaman King and neither do you!! (Sticks out tongue)**

**Me: (shoves him away) anyway getting on with the show**

**777777777777777777777777777777777777777**

**Victim 9: Oyamada Manta **

**777777777777777777777777777777777777777**

The sound of static fills the air; a quite sobbing can be head.

"Julia, How can you?"

"I'm sorry Chad I have to go!"

"NOOO! Julia don't go! He's the love of your life!!" A short Plucky boy screams. The stage lights up and an armchair with a TV in front is found on the stage.

Voice: Know your stars! Know your stars! Know your stars!

Manta: (sighs, sitting in a seat and the audience see the top of his head over the TV)

TV: (disappears into a trap door leaving Manta sitting in a chair)

Manta:0-0

Voice: Oyamada Manta he loves to perform illegal experiments with turkeys!!

Manta: (sigh) my turn is it…(another sigh) I don't really…

Voice: Sure sure…

Manta: I prefer chickens…

Voice: O.O

Audience: O-0

Voice: What wrong with you man?!?!

Manta: Julia... left (begins sobbing) oh... Julia…

Voice: get a hold of your self man it was a stinking soap!!

Manta: (sigh) Proceed...

Voice: Oyamada Manta secretly dances with a bowl of jelly every night!

Manta: V.V I don't I can't hold a bowl of jelly... It's too big…

Horo Horo: (in audience. Has a mental image of Manta dancing with a bowl of jelly) mmmmh… jelly….. v

Voice: Oyamada Manta has a room in his house where he has a random assortment of senior citizens, he get them to pat him each morning so he may grow up some day…

Manta: (sweat drop) this is getting ridiculous! There is no way scientifically possible that such a thing can occur!!

Voice: say what you may... my mom patted my head and now I'm a big boy!! oVo

ME: uh… Yeah (sweat drop) Rocky's a 32 year old man living with his mother big boy indeed…

Ren: . why did you pick him for the job??

Manta: Yeah?!?

Me: eh... I was on a low budget, his voice was annoying and the other guy was 'Haru' from Avatar…he may be 'sexyfine' (avatar abridged) but man was he creepy…

Everyone: O-O

Voice: hhmmp... Oyamada Manta is in fact part of the Edward Elric fanclub!

Me: O.O

Ren: Hey!!

Me: Kudos for you little guy!!

Manta: (chokes)

Voice: Manta is really in love with Anna's frying pan!

Anna: Yeauch! (Drops frying pan)

Manta: That evil culinary tool... the darkness seeps from its very core! I respect the frying pan as worthy opponent... but no I'm not in love with it...v.v

Voice: Sure thing kid… Oyamada Manta steals candy floss from children when their mother's aren't looking!!

Everyone: (le gasp)

Manta: Do not! (Sticks out tongue and then proceeds to eat purple candy floss)

Voice: Doo too!!

Manta: Doo not!

CandyFloss: You can do it too with Can doo!

Manta: Yargh! (Throws candy floss away and wipes tongue with hands!

Voice: Oyamada Manta is Santa's little helper!

Manta: Watch it rocky!! (Grinds teeth)

Voice: Oyamada Manta secretly lusts after Sailor mercury!

Manta: YOU LIE!! (Spits sparks)

Voice: Oyamada Manta killed Frodo!

Manta: (crouches on armchair) He was taking our precious Soaps from us... we had to didn't we precious?

Voice:… okay…

Me: wow... random…

Horo Horo: I'll say…

Voice: Oyamada manta has a total of four fan girls!

Audience( blink blink) (then burst out laughing)

Manta: (blush blush) ahehehe..

Voice: Oyamada Manta his grandma calls him morty because he mortifies her! (Begins to laugh)

Audience: eh?

Me: really rocky you've gotta stop improvising!! Tut-tut

Voice: hem... - Oyamada Manta …. Wait for it … is really Basil the great mouse detective!!

Manta: WTF?!?

Voice: It's true!

Manta: Mouse detective? I'll get you Rocky!!(Involuntarily joins forces with Hao's rocky dominion program)

Voice: Now the author has Chemistry on the brain... could happen to any one! Now you know Oyamada Manta who loves to perform illegal experiments with turkeys, gets patted by senior citizens, dances with jelly, is part of the Edward Elric fan club, in love with the frying pan, is an elf, lusts after Sailor Mercury, Killed Frodo, has a total of four fan girls and IS the great Mouse detective Basil of Baker street!

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**I'm finally done!**

**Review peoples!! And get hot chocolate and MARSHMELLOWS!**


	10. Ch 10 Victim 10:Bokutou No Ryu

**Hey!! Happy holidays every one! I'm back Mwahahaha!! And only a few days to my B-day which is on the 5****th**** if you must know! 0**

**This is the 4****th**** last chapter by the way peoples... (Sniff sniff) yes it's coming to an end! I won't bother you much and let you read on!!**

**Disclaimer: If I owned Shaman king I wouldn't really be surprised... because I've wrriten so many (written not published) fanfics that i practically own them... Practically not in reality… hehe…**

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Chapter 10: Bokutou No Ryu

Ryu: I won't!! I won't!! (runs around stage)

A short girl chases him around. Up and down the stage.

Lilly: Come back here you!! You must sit in the chair provided or face my Click-aty Clack-aty pen of DOOOOM!!! (clicks a big blue pen in hands)

Ryu: Neva!!(keeps running)

Laurry: (pops up randomly on stage)

(A/N: FYI: Laurry is me boyafied… ahem I mean he's my male alter-ego… ya… he looks like me only with shorter hair)

Laurry: She has your motorcycle hostage!

Ryu: Nooooo!!!

Audience: Slilence

Lilly: Now sit!! (clicks big blue pen)

Ryu: (sighs and then slumps on to a small stool on the middle of the stage the stool is extremely tiny and his legs protrude forward like a grass hoppers)

Lilly: (goes and sits in audience while clicking pen)

Voice: ahem…

Pen: Click-Click-Click

Voice: stop!!

Lilly: What??

Pen (still clicking)

Voice: STOP DOING THAT!!

Lilly: What?!?! (still clicking pen!)

Laurry: (pulls Lilly's hand down) that ….

Anna: 0.0 I have got to find a way out!! (uses nail file to try and cut chain keeping her in the seat)

On Stage

Voice: Ahem-hem Know your stars! Know your stars! Know your stars!

Ryu: (moans)

Manta: That you are. V.V

Voice: Bokutou No Ryu is Pompadour King…

Ryu: ( stars in eyes) that I am!!

Voice: Oh the under sea monkeys of Carpet land!!!

Ryu: T.T I'm not really..

Voice: sure sure..

Lyserg: (twitches) Car-Carpet Land…?

Hao: hey isn't that where I trapped you ?

Lyserg: . yes… (mutters) You will pay Hao and so will the carpet-

Lilly: Aww… he's so cute when he's deranged! (glomps Lyserg)

Lyserg: Ack!

Hao: (snigger)

Voice: Bokutou No Ryu is A Broker.

Silence.

Ryu: Umm…

Voice: Bokutou No Ryu is Tao En's hair stylist.

Ren: (choke) wha-aat?!?

En: heeheee! (waves from the back row)

Ryu: I serve no one's hair but my own!!

Voice: Rite…and your not wearing ladies under wear either?

Ryu: eep!!

Voice: Right??

Ryu: No I'm not!

Voice: yes you are!

Ryu: Noo!

Voice: Yess!!

In audience

Ren: You realize that these chapters are getting more and more drastic and less and less coherent??

Lilly: 0 yesh.. yesh I doo…

Ren: okay…

Laurry: (pops up on other side of Ren nearly giving the poor Chinese boy a heart attack ) she does really!!

Ren: ( heart pounding furiously) sure… -

Voice: No!

Ryu: Yes!! Yes!! Yes!!

Voice: heeheeheee…

Ryu: (claps hand over mouth)

Voice: You doo!

Ryu: I have been defeated by the oldest trick in the book…. I'm soo ashamed.. forgive me Bugs….

Voice: um….

Ryu: T-T ( begins crying) I cannot go on…

Lilly+Larry+Hao: Forgive him of great Bugs Bunny…V.V

Ren: (stuck in between the three) OO'

A giant bugs BUNNY appears on stage.

Voice: eeeeeek! (high pitched girlish scream)

Audience: arg!!

Yoh+Hao: C-Cool!!

Anna: (evil glare)

Giant bugs bunny: (in a loud deep voice) You Are Forgiven…

POOF!!

Bugs vanishes…

Voice: Oh… it's gone..phew..hey who screamed like a girl back there??

Sesshomaru: You did! ( Quietly from behind the voice sitting in booth)

Voice: Aiiiiii!!!!! (another girly scream and then a dead faint)

Horo: what the-

Lilly: (jumps on stage) Ladies , gentlemen, Spirits, imaginary friends and my night gown 'Pinky' the voice is in a 24 hour comma…VV

Ryu: YESS!!

Lilly: So my boy Laurence will take the show!! Take it away Laurry! BTW he's three!! And the sane one!!

Laurry poofs in to control booth room.

Laurry: I'll do my best Lilly-Chan!!

Silence.

Paper shuffles.

Laurry: Um.. what am I supposed to do exactly??

Lilly: Just read the paper!!

Ryu: (praying on the stool)

Laurry: Uhh.. if you say so… here I go then….. I like pretty ponies, I like pretty pink ponies, I like pretty Pink ponies a-and um.. card board?

Lilly: xx

Ren: 0o

Hao: (snigger)

Laurry: It says that all over the paper as well as um.. 'doodles?' of Prika…

Prika: 0O EWWW!!

Horo: (shudders)

Lilly: (sigh) Pooof poof pooof… there?

Laurry: Okay then…

Ryu: ( Falls off stool and lays on the ground)

Laurry: Bokutou No Ryu is really a supermarket attendant.

Ryu: oh please stop…

Laurry: Bokutou No Ryu is also one of the demon lunch lady's of Atlantis.

Ryu: TT oh.. happy place happy place..

Laurry: Bokutou No Ryu hates pie!!

Ryu: but I love Pie…

Laurry: Bokutou No Ryu likes to eavesdrop on Yohmei and Kino that's why he has such bad lines!

Yohmei: O.O??

Kino: grr… (pokes Yohmei with walking stick) You seeee!!

Ryu: but-but I would never!!

Voice: Quiet! I'm back!! (kicks Laurry out of the booth as well as killing a rabid donkey)

Laurry: Whuuah!! (falls into seat beside Ren)

Ren: Oh no! he's back!!

Anna: (trows popcorn on to stage) Hey! That kid was a natural at torture!!

Voice: Meh..

Anna: Don't get lippy with me mister!!

Voice: meep!!!

Anna: hmm…

A Random PC world assistant gets chased onto and off the stage by April-Chan holding a stake knife in one hand and documents for suing in the other.

April: Rarr!! o 

Assistant: gaaahh!!

Lilly: OO I swear that was sooooo not in the script!...

Voice: Oooh look at the time.. seems like we're out of it…SO now folks you know Bokutou No Ryu the pompadour king of the under sea monkeys of carpet land, a broker, Tao En's hair stylist, a supermarket attendant, the demon lunch lady of Atlantis, pie-hater and eaves dropper.!!

Ryu: BUT-BUT THEY DON'T KNOW ME AT ALL!! They don't know how I yearn for my shaman queen and my happy-(drops in to trap door on stage)

Lilly: happy new year every one and good bye!!

Laurry: yeah byeee!!!

Ren: Save mee!!

Voice: Tune in next time for KYS Iron maiden Jeanne!!

Jeanne: (sitting knitting in a corner) AAAIIIIII!!!! (throws knitting into air it lands on Hao head) Run away!!!

Hao: Watch it!! Or You burn!! Buh-bye now!!

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**Lilly: When I stated writing this chappie it was xmas now it's 15 mins to new year! Yay I am slow……**

**Laurry: this chappie goes out to all the faithfull reviewers who have been with us since the start of this fic!! **

**Lilly: sadly it is coming to a close!**

**Laurry: well don't forget to review!!**

**Lilly: Or the bunnies!! Remember!!**

**REVIEW!!**


	11. Ch 11 Victim 11: Iron Maiden Jeanne

**Lilly: Yo! Yo! Yo!**

**Yoh: Huh? What?**

**Lilly : I don't mean **_**you!!**_

**Yoh: oh... T.T**

**Lilly: So I know its been like jamming ages since I updated this thing... So here you go... I made sometime in my oh so busy schedule for my great love Shaman King. Do the Disclaimer Laurry!! w**

**Laurry: Lilly-nee-Chan hmm.. Sadly owns nothing... Nothing what so ever... Not even a measly cellphone... heehee**

**Lilly: Kyaa!! Give it back you little badger child!!**

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**Victim 11 Iron Maiden Jeanne**

A lone chair sits in the muddle yes I said muddle of the floor.

On is lays an albino beauty. Her silver hair fanning out behind her. For its a chair in which one can lay down.

Jeanne: A-and then h-he took my teddy mister teddykins!!

Voice: I see, and how do you _feel_ about that?

Whispering.

Voice: What? on air?! (paper shuffles) ah.. Hum... Uh... Know your stars! Know your stars! Know your stars! And welcome to another Vic- er... I mean chapter!

Today we have Iron Maiden Jeanne as our special guest!!

Jeanne: What? I thought this was my daily session!!

Voice: It is... .

Jeanne: O.o'

Voice: (sigh) fine... I won't charge you for the extra hour...

Jeanne: O.o'

Voice: Grr... Anyhoo... Iron Maiden Jeanne is not really a nun! She's too young!

Jeanne: I am too! I am god's messenger if I believe!! (Gets really holy look)

Voice: . rite...

Lyserg: (woot) go Jeanne-sama!!

Voice: The Iron Maiden Jeanne is really mr. Fudgkins the barbers assistant!

Jeanne: eh?

Horo:(bawling) Mr.fudgekins how could you!! _I _was going to be your assistant!!

Voice: Got some real ones today...

Knocking noise.

Me: Yeah.. He just knocked his head...

Voice: The Iron Maiden Jeanne does ballet lessons with Ichigo.

Audience: gasp gasp

Voice: That is the one from Bleach not the mew mew.

More gasping.

Jeanne: Whuah!! Don't lie Rocky you know I go to lessons with your neice Agnes!

Voice: eh.. Uh.. Um. The Iron Maiden Jeanne is really Huckleberry Fin!!

Jeanne: And I thought this was supposed to be torture...

Voice: The Iron Maiden Jeanne was infact injected with parothormone!! Thus leading her to join a gang of parakeets in downtown Orleans before she was thrown out for being too much of a potty mouth!!

Hao: WTF?!

Jeanne: Ain't no shame in bloody well harping colorfully, homie! (aquires baggy orange trousers and a red midriff baring hoodie top)

Hao: Cripes!! ( nosebleed)

Voice: What the crapitty crap crap?!

Jeanne: If you don' shut yer frickin' piehole I will shut the damn thing for you!! (Stands on the the therapy chair and proceeds to lead a bunch of random ballerinas and parakeets in a mindless rap over frisbees and axles)

Ren: hey that's kind of catchy...

Pirika: If You say soo...

Voice: Ahem-- IF YOUR Quiet done!!

Jeanne: one second- Cause we all just wanna be big frisbees and live with Axles and drive big iron cars!! Brek-a-brick-a-break-a-break it down... WORD!! Okay I'm done (sits back in chair.)

Vce: Right so The Iron Maiden Jeanne likes to feed hungry lions Vegtables.

Jeanne: Do you think I doubt God's ability to provide for his creatures?? That I would feed the wild? (crossing arms)

Voice: O-o-okay... Rite then...

The Iron Maiden Jeanne is a Higgly town hero!!

Jeanne: (Complete outrage) I would never conform to such a thing!!Neva I say!!

Marco: My lady how could you associate with a- such- uh... You know those russian dolls... What are they called??

Me: I can't remember.. Someone tell Me...

Marco: Yes well how Could you asssociate with such.. dolls??

Jeanne: Did you not hear me?? I said ' Neva!!'

Marco: oh.. Did you ... Sorry my listening device wasn't on...

Everyone: o.o'

Voice: The Iron Maiden Jeanne has been missing for the last couple of chapters because she was at the oscars.

Jeanne: eh?

Voice: Trying to get Jhonny Deps autograph!

Jeanne: um.. No.. I wasn't...

Voice: The Iron Maiden Jeanne goes

to a Nazi support group on Thursdays and Sundays!

Jeanne: No! I go to church on Sunday! And its the library for me on Thursdays... V.V

Voice: uh-huh... keep telling yourself that... The Iron Maiden Jeanne she really has no shoes because while she was in the iron maideshe gave all her shoes to a hyena charity...

Jeanne: What are these then? (points to shoes)

Voice: Those belong to Inuyasha... Have you not noticed he never has _any _shoes on..

Yoh: Omgwtfbbfgq! He doesn't!!

Anna:... Yeah... And you care because...

Yoh: I don't. I just had a random urge to scream that out loud...

Me: Laurry step away from the 'random urge button' ...

Laurry: Ahehehe...

Random Chibi Hyena: (walks by wearing a pair of flipflops)

Audience: (Blink, blink)

Jeanne: ACK!!(falls of therapy chair and lands on face) T-T Ahaahaa... My precious flip flops...I need a moment to pray to God (whispering) Please don't hurt them.. I promise I will feed the chickens when I get out of here just let me have my shouezies back!! (gets up, off floor and then sits expectantly in chair)

Voice: Rightio... The Iron Maiden Jeanne is a baboon...

All: (le gasp!!)

Ren: (falls over) okay... Now i'm just confused...

Voice: She lives in a zoo!

Jeanne: B-but I don't!!

Voice: The Iron Maiden Jeanne is infact as we speak a resident of cage no. 2,365,488,915...

Jeanne: BUT I'M RIGHT HERE!!

Voice: Sure you are...

Jeanbe: Argh...

Horo: And thought he had issues...(points to Lyserg who is foaming at the mouth)

Lyserg: RARRRG!!

Voice: The Iron Maiden Jeanne owns a trampoline!!

Jeanne: eh?!

Voice: Meh...

Me: geh...

Hao: bleh...

Anna: Keh..

Random telly tuby: feh...

All: O-o'

Voice: And now you know The Iron Maiden Jeanne, she's not really a nun,

is really mr. Fudgkins the barbers assistant, does ballet lessons with Ichigo, is really Huckleberry Fin, was infact injected with parothormone and joined a gang of parakeets in downtown Orleans before she was thrown out for being too much of a potty mouth, likes to feed hungry lions Vegtables, is a Higgly town hero, was at the Oscars trying to get Jhonny Deps autograph, goes to a Nazi support group on Thursdays and Sundays, eally has no shoes because while she was in the iron maideshe gave all her shoes to a hyena charity, is a baboon living in a zoo AND wns a trampoline!! (breathes in air) And now you know The Iron Maiden Jeanne!!

Jeanne: But the don't know me at all!! They don't know how I strive to be good or my love of children-

Voice: Holy Crow!! Shes a Pedoph-

Me: OK- KAY!! Ahehehe we'll be finishing of today! Hehehe... Tune in next time to see who is next on Know your stars- Shaman King... He hasn't said a word... For a loooong time...

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**Lilly: Third last chapter... T.T oh what Woe... (huggels Laurry) What a sad... Sad occasion...**

**Laurry: Can't breath...**

**Lilly:Oh and I've heard Shaman King's starting up again! Do let me know about it my faithful reviewers!!**

**Laurry: Yeah... Cuz she can't be bothered to go check herself...**

**Lilly: Hey I'm a buzy person... Hmpf...**

**Laurry: Review anyway please...**

**Lilly: And Two.. That's right two of you could to be on the last chapter of this fanfic... So REVIEW!! GO GO GO GO!!**

**DOO IT!!**


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